I don't remember when I woke up. With all the drugs I was on, everything is hazy and my timeline is a mess. I know it was Wednesday, the same day of the surgery. I think my parents were there when I woke up. I could be mistaken. Here is what I can tell you though. My mom was there at some point and I asked her to give me a pedicure. I remember her doing my left foot and getting to my right big toe, but I must have passed out because I don't even know when she left. I know my dad brought my aunt Diana over. She works at UW, so it's not like she had far to go. No idea what we talked about. I had been out of it for a while when someone came to my room. It took me a bit to figure out who it was. It was my foster sister Vanessa. She was like "Look who I brought!" and there were people behind her. I remember I was about to say I had no idea who they were when it dawned on me it was her two sisters and mother. One of her sisters had a baby with her. Wow. Lots of people. To be honest, it was a bit overwhelming. Good thing that baby was quiet the whole time. Vanessa's sister had cancer several years ago. I can't remember what type, but she was only like 13 or 15 at the time. I remember having visited her in the Children's hospital (Ronald McDonald house). We talked a bit about cancer stuff that only cancer people can understand.
Like I said, I sort of can't remember the days that things happened and it's all jumbled in my head. I know my cousin Brandon (who happens to be my Home Teacher and Elder's Quorum President) and a girl in my ward came to visit at some point. Once again, no idea what we talked about. However, the girl from my ward that came, she was wearing a mask because apparently she had a cough. The nurse came in and totally got upset with her. Really though. If you're sick at all, don't visit a surgery oncology ward at the hospital. Think it through.
Three girls from my ward came at another point during my week. I feel horrible and can only remember Renae being one of them. And then I think there was also another group of three girls from church... Jen and Marybeth and ... Amy! Ha, I remember that one. Jen's dad is a big Guru surgery doctor type, so she understands.
My sister and our friend Jeff came to visit me. Who knows what chit chat we were involved in, but I had a scary moment. I had lots of phlegm stuck in my throat and with the pain from my stomach and side, I couldn't cough it out. I was choking. I tried sticking my fingers down my throat to pull it out but that didn't work much. My sister got up and grabbed a nurse. I think eventually we got the phlegm out, but I had entered complete panic attack mode. I couldn't breathe. I was freaking out, I was so scared. They placed the oxygen tube in my nose to give me air. I think I stayed on that for a couple of hours. Once things settled down, I told my sister that I was sorry. I didn't mean to scare her. She admitted to being worried.
Over the next several days, I had some visitors. My aunt Lorena came and stayed for several hours on Sunday and just helped me do little things and chatted with me. She showed up just as I was getting up to go for a brief walk. I really enjoyed having her there. I don't even remember all that we did. I do remember her giving me an awesome gift though.
As most of you will remember, Vlad was the name I gave my tumor. Green is the color for Kidney Cancer Awareness. And why is it a football? Well, the doctor said after the surgery that it ended up being the size of a football. Crazy hu? So I just thought that her gift was hilariously perfect. Great thought put into it.
I had several nurses and people that worked with me. I definitely do not remember what they all looked like or what they did. I DO remember two people. One was this guy who would help me sit up, reposition my pillows, get me water, simple things like that. He was great. He always called me sweetheart and hon and stuff. Normally, I HATE it when people say things like that, but I could tell he totally cared about taking care of me. Don't remember his name and I might be able to point him out if I saw him.. (Wow, a whole week, you'd think I'd remember). Unfortunately, the one person I remember a bunch about, Raine, I'd rather forget. She did the same stuff as the guy, helping me with those things, but I hated her. She bugged me so much.
I believe it was Sunday or Monday, and I had another panic attack. It wasn't as bad as the first because I was monitoring myself and trying to calm down my breathing, but I was still freaking out and couldn't breathe. I told her I needed oxygen and she said no. Ok, now I understand nurses and doctors know more and should tell patients no at some point, but the way she did this was so rude. It basically came off to me as "I know you can't breathe, but I'm not giving you oxygen, so you're now going to die." When my aunt Lorena was visiting, an ice pack leaked all over my bed. Everything was wet. I was so numb and drugged up that it took a while for me to notice. I don't remember this, but my aunt told me later: This nurse, Raine, came in to give me a new ice pack (life savers, ps) and my aunt said she was like taunting it in front of me. She was waving it in front of my face like "Want an ice pack? Yeah? You really want one? haha I have it" My aunt had to yell "stop!" at the nurse because apparently my eyes had fixated on it and I couldn't take my eyes off of it no matter what I tried. She said it was freaky and so she has a poor taste for that nurse as well.
So, as I'm writing this blog, I was talking with my sister, and she reminded me of a ton of stuff. I had only remembered her coming that one time, but apparently she visited me like 3 times. ha ha wow do drugs make you forget or what!? Once she started telling me of stuff, I started to remember. My aunt Diana came with my cousin Jacque and her best friend, Emma. As always though, I don't remember what we talked about but now I remember them there. My sister also came with our roommate Lana at one point and we ended up watching 27 dresses. Pretty sure I probably fell asleep during it, but I enjoyed the company nonetheless. This also I think was the only time I used the TV. So, yes, there were several other people that came.
During my stay, there were a bunch of different things that I had to do. They gave me this lovely little contraption that I had to breathe into to gauge my lung capacity.
I also had to get up a few times to walk down the hall to get some movement and exercise. They had a walker that I had to use. It was a little difficult because the arm rests were super high. Three weeks later and I'm still having a bit of trouble lifting my left arm. A couple of times during my stay I had to receive X-Rays. They'd put me in a wheelchair and take me down the elevator to like the second floor I believe. This was hard and kind of painful. They had me life my arms and hold onto these handles but they were like way above my head. It was difficult but we were able to do it. The first few times they wanted me to go on walks, I couldn't because my chest tube had to be connected to the wall, so I just hung my feet over the bed and then stood by the bed.
So, something I know a LOT of you have been waiting for is details of how the surgery went. Well, according to the doctor, it took 5 1/2 hours and was one of the most difficult surgeries he's ever done. He's been doing this for 10 years. One thing that I did not know until Monday or Tuesday about my surgery is that they had to go through my ribs to get out all of the tumor. Now, I guess (although I didn't hear this beforehand) that it's pretty typical with this type of surgery to break a rib. With me, they didn't just break a rib, they actually went to the middle of my middle rib and took out about a two inch piece. So, that's the reason for a lot of my pain and swelling. My incision however is HUGE. I'm seriously not kidding. It starts at my bellybutton, goes up under my breast and around the back just shy of the edge of my shoulder blade. All in all, there were 44 staples put in to seal the seam.
Let me talk about this photo for a second. Yes, I'm sorta groping myself. Oh well. Get over it. haha Also, that huge band-aid patch you see is where my chest tube went in. It was there to help drain. Although the entire time, the nurses were saying that it was really nice because not much was coming out. Enough was coming out that they weren't concerned, but the stuff and amount that was coming out made them pleased. My incision starts just about where you see it at my belly button but goes back quite a bit than you can actually see in this picture. I'm already showing WAY more of my body than I ever have and normally would, so don't complain with what you're getting. :)
**WARNING** **STOP** **WARNING**
Let me forewarn you. I have a pretty graphic image coming up. A nurse, doctor, something, not sure what she is, told me the first day that she had a picture of my tumor for me. I had wanted to see the tumor and everything once it was taken out, and had reminded people several times, but I guess someone forgot. Either that, or it was decided that couldn't happen. She came in on Monday to show me the picture. I was shocked. I usually really hate looking at graphic medical stuff, but for some reason since it was me I wasn't grossed out. I know some people don't like looking at that type of stuff, and others absolutely love it! So, I figured I'd give some fair warning. Yes, the entire thing you are about to see is tumor, kidney and lymph node. It's all Vlad. There's also something a little extra there. Can you see it?
So? What do you think? The little extra thing is THERE IS A FACE!!! Do you see it? Vlad totally has a face. Craziness.
Well, for now I can't think of much else. Perhaps I'll edit this post if I think of more things. Stay Tuned for my Part 3 which will include what the last few weeks have been like. Thanks everyone!!!
